Three things...

For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 

 Romans 8:5

 So, how do we do it? How do we set our minds on the Spirit and not on the flesh? Daily we are bombarded with things of the flesh. We are constantly told what will make us happy...losing weight, buying this, buying that, this man, that woman, money, vacations, and so much more. We live in a fast food culture, we can get what we want, when we want it, now! So how does a Christian live in this culture and not allow themselves to live in the flesh?

Last fall I attended a prayer retreat and one of the things I wanted God and I to work on that weekend was my time with Him. I had gotten into a rut and I didn't want my relationship with God to become something I just checked off at the end of the day. I needed a fresh way to look at things, God gave me a word picture one morning, three simple actions I need to take each day, not part of a checklist, more a way to show my love. Each day at some point I need to KNEEL, SIT, and STAND.


Kneel- Each day I need time to fall on my knees and worship God, a time when I praise Him, when I stand in awe of Him. I will crank the praise music and get lost in worshiping Him. I also LOVE sunsets, I try everyday to catch a glimpse of the sun going down, it almost always takes my breath away and for a moment I worship the One who painted that sunset. There are more ways to kneel before God, those are two ways that work for me. 

Sit- Each day I need to find time to sit in God's presence, to soak in His word. Sometimes it is only one simple verse that God gives me, other days I get lost in the Scripture. It is just my time to spend alone with God. I realize this may not be as easy for some of you, I happen to be an empty-nester and interruptions are not as issue. If your house has more activity, you need to be creative to find the time to steal some precious minutes to read the love letter God wrote to you. I am sure if your husband gave you a sweet note, you would eagerly read it...that is all God wants us to do, read what He wrote.

Stand- I need to stand in the gap for others and for myself. This represents my prayer life. To keep myself from being consumed by the flesh, I need to pray, I need consider the needs of others and lift them up to the Lord. It is also ok to pray for myself, so I do that, I ask God to strengthen me, to show me how I can grow, to convict me of issues I need to work on. 

Do, I remember to Kneel, Sit and Stand each day? No, I do not, there are days when I am defeated from the beginning. These are days I allow myself to be consumed by the things of the world, days I am selfish, more set on the things of the flesh. Those days don't go so well. The days I do remember to do these three things, I find myself more content, more joyful, more set on the things of the Spirit. 

One powerful word...

I would like to introduce some of you to a word that I believe has become extinct in some of your vocabularies. This word is one of the most powerful and freeing words in the English language. The word is no. That's right...no! Such a small word, but such a difficult word for many of us to utilize. Many of us have given up use of this word for its companion...yes. This friends is dangerous, not only to us, but to our families, friends and even to those we are saying yes.

I have a personal philosophy that I try my best to live by. Whenever asked to do something, I always say no first! This is followed by a simple statement that I will however pray about it and get back to them. And for those of you who feel guilty saying no, let me assure no one has ever assaulted me, ministries have not come to a screeching halt due to my lack of involvement in them, and the world is not radically different as a result of this no. Now, there are exceptions to this (as with everything), times I will say yes immediately. For the big things, the things that will involve time and energy on my part, I pray about.

So, why is saying yes too often dangerous? It is dangerous for the simple reason that yes can cause us to get spread too thin, our families are not given the attention and time they need, perhaps this is not our gifting,  maybe our yes will keep someone who should be doing it from getting the blessing of serving, and ministries that are run by people who don't really want to be there will suffer.

When we were children we were good at saying no. It seems the entire year of the terrific 2's is devoted to the word no. When we were little we didn't feel guilty about saying no, if we didn't want to do something we would dig our heels in and say no! So why is it so hard for us to say no as adults, when does this change?  I believe guilt and comparison are our two worst enemies to the ability to say no.

Guilt is sometimes used as a recruiting tool. We start to feel bad that nobody is stepping up so we say yes. We often say yes without even realizing that we are already overextended, overtaxed and overtired. Then once we are involved guilt creeps back in, we then feel guilty for neglecting other things; our family, our other ministries, our sleep.

Comparison is subtle, but just as dangerous as guilt. We see someone in the church who is involved in everything and we see that we have just one area where are involved in. Soon we begin thinking this person is more spiritual than we are, so we begin to say yes. We should never compare our involvement to others' involvement. We don't answer to anyone but God for what we do. If has gifted you and given you a passion for one area of ministry, then do it! You will be serving God in the way He desires you to!

No is a powerful word, but it can be dangerous as well. Your no's are only powerful if you are also able to use the word yes. They are a pair, they need to be balanced. So say no first, but pray for God to show you when to say yes. Imagine if we all did this; the church would be full of people serving where God wants them to served. People would be leading more balanced lives, they would be joyful and those they are serving will benefit as well.

What do you think? A man had two sons. And he went to the first and said, ‘Son, go and work in the vineyard today.’  And he answered, ‘I will not,’ but afterward he changed his mind and went.  And he went to the other son and said the same. And he answered, ‘I go, sir,’ but did not go. Which of the two did the will of his father?” They said, “The first.” 

Matthew 21:28-31

But above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or by any other oath, but let your “yes” be yes and your “no” be no, so that you may not fall under condemnation.

James 5:12 

Of piano playing and cheese graters...

I have a confession to make. It's a big one...are you ready? I'm a pastor's wife and I don't play piano! There, that felt good to get it out in the open! I feel so free now that you know.

Ok, so I know that pastor's wives are not all piano players, some are, but many are not. However, that is one of the stereotypes of us. How boring would it be if all pastor's wives were the same? How boring would it be if all Christians were the same?

I am reading through "Crazy Love" by Frances Chan (AMAZING BOOK!). In the chapter I am reading now he talks about how sometimes as Christians we try to be like other Christians. He illustrated it in a great way. Imagine if you opened your drawer and all you found were cheese graters, and you wanted to eat soup. A cheese grater won't help you there. The Church needs more than cheese graters too! If we were all the same, how would anything get done in the church?


So, as I pondered this chapter today, I realized that I am not a cookie cutter pastor's wife and that's ok! I am actually not a cookie cutter anything! I don't want to be like other people, but I do want to be like Jesus! I want to be the person He created me to be!

How about you? Do you find yourself falling in the trap of trying to be a cheese grater, when God has called you to be a different utensil? What is your passion? Is there a need you see that you feel needs to be filled? If so, then perhaps you are the very person to meet that need!

So ponder with me today...what does God want from you? What did He create you to be?

Three weeks...

 Three weeks ago, a giant orange truck pulled up in front of our home in Hampton.

Three weeks ago, I watched with amazement as the movers packed everything we owned into that truck like a giant game of Tetris.

Three weeks ago,  I stood in an empty house as tears rolled down my cheeks. Not because I was going to miss the house, but because of all the memories it holds.

 Three weeks ago, we drove away from this house, with a for sale sign still in the yard. The promise of a buyer still unmet.

Three weeks ago, we drove away from a neighborhood, church and community we loved.

Three weeks ago, Brian and I began yet another new adventure!

Our first Sunday at our new church!

 
It has only been three weeks and the memories and emotions of the move are still raw. I still get tears in my eyes as I remember watching that truck pull away from our home; knowing that all we had left to do was drive away.

The past three weeks have not been filled entirely with tears. We have experienced some pretty amazing emotions as well. We drove into a new community and felt welcomed from the moment we stepped out of our truck!

In the past three weeks we have been loved on in some amazing ways. Our new church family has made us feel more than welcome!! The warmth of the welcome here did so much to lessen the sting of the good-byes we had just gone through. We had movers who would have unloaded everything themselves, but our church family showed up and helped them out. The movers were hesitant at first, but it was a hot day and in the end they were amazed that so many people would show up to help out a family they barely knew. What a great witness to these guys! Their load was lessened and there was plenty of food and water to refresh them before they went on their way.

In the past three weeks, Brian and I have learned we are too old to move! It's hard work, both emotionally and physically. We are still learning our way around our new home, will we ever learn what all these light switches turn on? Will we ever find the shop vac hose? Will we ever figure out where things go in the kitchen? Even brushing our teeth has been different, the toothpaste and toothbrush are in new locations! What do all the buttons on my oven, my dishwasher, my washer and dryer do? Why are there so many buttons on all these appliances? I am used to on/off! Now I have to think!!

In the past three weeks, God has showed us He is faithful! That house we drove away from without a buyer is now under contract!! We had prayed to get a certain amount for our home and the amount we settled on is exactly the amount we prayed for. The inspection on our home showed a problem that could have cost us a few thousand dollars, within 30 minutes of finding out about this issue we got good news! The buyers decided to sign off on the contract and are not asking us to do anything! For a few months now we have been praying for the buyers of our home, now we can keep praying for them, only now we know their name.

In the past three weeks, there have been some tears. It is a natural part of moving...well for women anyway!! I kept telling Brian the tears would come, I didn't know when, I just knew they would. When they came, they came in force! There is so much involved with moving besides just packing and unpacking; all the little things just built up and overwhelmed me! Thankfully, Brian kept his shoulder available for me. He knows the drill by now, walk over hold me and let me cry!! God really gave him a great set of strong shoulders!!

So, after three weeks are we settled yet? No...still lots of things to do. After three weeks, we feel more at home. We are seeing our new church as our new family, we are beginning to see what an amazing place God has called us to. We may be a bit north, the accents may be a bit different than we are used to, there may be different crops, different weather patterns; but one thing remains the same... God! God is faithful, He brought us here and both Brian and I are excited to see what God has in store for us here!!

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

 Hebrew 13:8

I'm an alien...and proud of it!

Tomorrow, Brian and I drive out of Iowa. When do we become Minnesotans? Is it the minute we cross the border tomorrow? Do we have to live there  a certain amount of time to be considered Minnesotan or should I say Minnesoooootan? I have been pondering this for quite sometime. We have lived in several states, we've been Iowans, Coloradans, South Dakotans and soon Minnesotans. If we aren't careful we could have an identity crisis!!

But you know what? It doesn't really matter where we live on this earth. We will never be home. We were not meant to feel at home here. Today in my Bible reading I read Hebrews 11...its one of my favorite chapters in the whole Bible. How amazing that today of all days that is where I was reading. I needed to read about the faith of some amazing men and women. I needed to read Hebrews 11:13. It says; And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth.

I am an alien! We should all feel that way. We should never feel so tied down to this earth that we aren't excited about heaven. So, today, as I listen to the packers packing up my belongings and as I get sad about leaving this town behind...I need to realize this isn't my home anyway...heaven is! We've been here seven years and as I said yesterday, our roots in this town run deep. Maybe God is moving us before we have too deep of roots. He wants us to remember that we are strangers on this planet and what better way to remind us than by a move! For the next several months we will feel like strangers in a new town. Instead of allowing this to be a difficult thing, I need to keep reminding myself that I am an alien!!! Maybe that will keep me looking up to God and to my true home...heaven!!

There is a season for everything...even moving...

Tomorrow the movers show up at our home. We have been praying for and preparing for this event for quite some time. The best way to describe how I am feeling right now is surreal. Brian and I are truly experiencing conflicting emotions. We are excited and ready to be in Roseau; and we are grieving leaving Hampton.

When we moved here 7 years ago, we knew this is where God wanted us to be...for a season. God is the God of seasons, and our season in Iowa is coming to a close. Our roots go deep here, we may have only been here 7 years, but they were 7 very special years. This is where our children all became adults...this is where we spent hours and hours cheering on the Bulldogs in various sports...this is where we made lifelong friendships...this is where we grew even closer as a family...this is where we poured ourselves into a church family...this is a special place. To quote a line from a movie "This isn't heaven...it's Iowa!".

The one question we get over and over is why are you moving? Brian and I both have the same answer...God. He put the call in Brian's heart that it was time to move on. He awakened the passion Brian has for preaching, and He allowed me to be in agreement with Brian that it was time to move on. God led us to this church and thankfully they decided they wanted us too!!

Some people have mentioned that Brian is getting a promotion. We don't feel that way. To say becoming a senior pastor is a promotion diminishes the role of the associate pastor. We have always felt as long as we are serving the Lord where He wants us then we are doing what we are supposed to be. There is no corporate ladder in the church. So, Brian is not getting a promotion, but he is getting a relocation and a new assignment. We will still be serving the Lord; just in a different way. We are excited to see the shape this new ministry will take.

So, today I feel like we are on the edge of the unknown. We know where we will live, we know what church we will attend; but there is so much yet to learn and experience. I am so thankful that through all the changes in our lives...there is one constant....God...He never changes. So as we leave one very special season in our lives behind...we excitedly follow God to a new season...I can't wait!!

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified
because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you;
He will never leave you nor forsake you.
Deuteronomy 31:5, 6

One life can make a difference...

Have you ever wondered if one life can really make  a difference? Well one life can and does all the time! We were reminded of this recently. My husband heard from a person who was impacted by our family several years ago. He told my husband that we had taken him to a football game when he was a kid, he remembers playing with our son, and having fun at the game. He said it was one of his best days ever. We were amazed at this story for one simple reason...we barely remembered the day. How amazing that a normal day for us was an extraordinary day for someone else. I find myself wondering what we did that was so special. I may never know the exact answer to that question, but God used it to remind me that even when I'm not aware of it, my life can make a difference. I need to live my life everyday in a way that is pleasing and honoring to God. If I pray for God to help me do just that everyday and listen to what he wants, I will make a difference.

Another similar incident happened almost 20 years ago. Back in those days, my husband was a youth pastor, so we spent a great deal of time with teenagers; sometimes we were less than patient with them. One such time of impatience for me occurred on a trip to Valley Fair with our youth. The night before our big day at the park we were staying at a church and I was so tired. I happened to be laying on the floor next to a few girls who decided it would be fun to stay up all night. The next morning I none to happy with them and I decided to be their shadow that day. Anytime they looked tired, I forced them to walk to another ride, I didn't give them chance to rest all day. I was trying to teach them a lesson and I must say I did it with a pretty sour attitude! Several years later when God called us to another ministry I received a note from one of those girls. She thanked me for that day and told me how much it had meant to her. I was stunned. You really never know what or how your actions will touch people. God can even use a negative attitude for his glory!!

I've been thinking about the people in my life who have made a big difference in my life. I remember Lori, my youth leader in high school. Just watching her live her life impacted me. There wasn't one aha moment, but I was watching her. There was Maggie, the lady who stopped by to visit me right after Brian and I were married and living in seminary housing. She was such a sweet heart and she shared with me about life in the "fish bowl". Then there was Karen, she impacted me just by being a mother to her kids. I saw how they respected her and how she loved them. Watching her mothering style greatly impacted my own mothering style. She never told me what to do, she showed me! There are many more names I could list. People who may not have even realized the impact they had on me, each one of those lives was part of the puzzle to help me strengthen my faith and grow into who I am today.

How about you? Who in your life is watching? How can you make a difference? Remember it doesn't take much!

...nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven. Matthew 5:15-16

Square Peg...Round Hole...That's Me...

I've been just a little different from the beginning. I came into this world feet first instead of head first, I'm a lefty in a right-handed world, an introvert in an extrovert world, a Mary in a Martha world, a stay-at-home mom in a world where women are a great presence in the workforce, a homeschooler on a block full of public school teachers, and a Christian in a non-Christian world!  I'm a square peg in a round hole and I wouldn't have it any other way!

Have you ever felt out of place somewhere? Like everyone was staring at you because they could tell you didn't belong there? That is how we are to feel here on earth. God put us here, but only for a season. We will only feel truly at home in heaven.  

But our citizenship is in heaven..Philippians 3:19 

Because our citizenship is in heaven, there will be times when we do not feel at home in this world. But we need to remember our mission here is not to feel at home; we do not want to become a round peg!

And do not be conformed to this world...Romans 12:2

The Bible is full of men and women who were square pegs...God used each and everyone of them. Abraham traveled and was an alien in a new land and he became the father of a great nation. Joseph was forced to be a slave in a foreign country, yet God used him to save many lives. Esther was an alien and yet God used her for "such a time as this" and saved a nation. 

I think God does his best work with square pegs. He likes to take something that doesn't quite fit, isn't quite at home, or would otherwise be overlooked and  use that square peg for his glory! Some more recent examples of square pegs are two of my heroes, Cori ten Boom and Elisabeth Elliot.

Cori ten Boom was a Christian in a Jewish concentration camp. She did not belong there, nobody did. She did not stifle her voice though. She shared her faith and led Jewish women to know the Lord, her influence in their lives may not have been the same had she not been a square peg.

Elisabeth Elliot lived among the Auca Indians. She was very much a square peg, she was  a white woman among a very violent people, the very people who murdered her husband. She was able to share the Good News with these people and lead them to the Lord, this did not happen because she was one of them, but because she was a square peg.

How about you? Are you a square peg or a round peg? I personally like not fitting into the round hole. For I want a life that is set apart, a life that honors the Lord!

 Linking up today with:

23...a great number...

Today I decided to research the number 23 and see if I could find any facts on it. I was amazed at how many facts I found!

• It takes 23 seconds for blood to circulate through the human body.
• Each parent contributes 23 chromosomes to a baby.
• 23 is Michael Jordan's number.
• The most quoted Psalm is Psalm 23.
• The 23rd letter of the alphabet is W, as in wedding.
• 23 years ago today, I married my BEST FRIEND!

 

The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Genesis 2:18

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 

I Corinthians 13:13

Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth for your love is more delightful 

than wine.  Song of Solomon 1:2 

Following are the lyrics to the song Brian used when he proposed and he sang it at our wedding. The words mean even more after 23 years of life together!!

Promise Me 

by Kenny Marks

Oh won't you promise me
That you'll always care
That no matter the distance between us
You'll always be there
Now it's easy to be there for you
But we don't know what we're gonna go through
So no matter what changes we see
Won't you promise me

Oh won't you promise me
That you'll never forget
All the things that have happened to us
Since the day we met
As the years bring new faces and friends
I won't let these memories end
So no matter what changes we see
Won't you promise me

(bridge)
Well the good things we feel for each other
We don't have to fake
Love is the heart and soul
Of the promise we make

I gotta know what you're going through
I promise to be there for you
So no matter what changes we see
Won't you promise me

I love you BK...you're my lobster!!

My dad...

The day started out just like any other day. Brian left for work and I loaded up the kids for story hour at the library. It was a nice fall day outside, late September. Library days were special, the lady running the story hour was one of those ladies that was meant to be a librarian. As we headed home we were just chatting away about the story and the crafts done that day. That's where the day ceased to be normal.

When I got home, I noticed my husband's car in the garage and I thought, "Hmm, hope the church didn't fire him!" (with a chuckle) Little did I know the news he did have for me when I got inside. He came out to help get kids out of car seats and I noticed he was not acting like himself. I got inside first and noticed a note on the counter with the name of a funeral home. I turn around and asked him; "Did my dad die?" The look in his eyes told me everything. I burst into tears.

The next week was a blur with making plans. We lived in South Dakota, the funeral was in Iowa and my dad died in Colorado. Lots of plans needed to be made. I remember being just numb, not knowing how to feel. We even found laughter as we realized we had final say in two things. First of all my dad was extremely afraid of heights and said he would never fly; well we flew his body to Iowa! Second, my dad was notorious for mixing stripes and plaids and just never quite matching, we made sure his clothes matched at his funeral! He actually would have laughed at these two things!

I grieved many things that week and to be honest for years to come. The end of my dad's life was marked with much sorrow. He lived in a rented room, in a city hundreds of miles from family. He chose to turn to alcohol to soothe his pain. He cut off all contact from me two years before he died. I tried calling, writing, seeking help from my uncle; all to no avail. I felt as though I was unworthy of his love. So when I found out he was gone, my first reaction was, "He can't hurt me any more."

Growing up,  I knew my dad was not perfect; life just seemed to be difficult for him. One thing I knew though, he loved me. He was a goofy guy, who would always go the extra mile to make birthdays more special. We would always pick out the annual Christmas tree together, and every year, it was uglier than the year before! One year we picked out a tree in October, determined to get a good one. When we went to cut it down; someone had stolen it! So, another ugly tree.

He loved that birthday cake!

After my parents divorced and my dad moved to Colorado, our relationship consisted of letter writing. I would write him often telling of my life and sending him pictures. When I got married he proudly and nervously walked me down the aisle. Things seemed to be going great. He was so proud of his granddaughters and would brag about them and try to see them whenever he could. Then in 1993 all contact ceased.

Walking me down the aisle.

It was in 1993 that I felt led to address my dad's drinking. I shared from my heart how it concerned me. I went on to share Jesus with him. You see, my dad was not a Christian, and that bothered me immensely. I wrote this all in a letter to him, as that was our primary means of communication. It was the last letter of mine he ever opened. He kept every letter, but never opened them. He never even saw a picture of my son. Those years were so very hard on me. I felt he had rejected me. I was a 28 year old mother, who still wanted her daddy's approval and love.

When I went to Colorado to settle up my dad's affairs, I met with the lady who was with him when he died. My dad drove cab and this lady was in his cab when he had the heart attack. It was a long trip to the airport, so they had plenty of time to talk. My dad shared with her all about me. That really confused me, the man who refused to answer my letters or calls still bragged about me. He hadn't rejected me after all! What he had done however was condemn himself, he thought since he was an alcoholic, he was unlovable. The prison his mind must have been in at that time, I can't even imagine.

For years, I lived with a deep sense of regret. How dare I write my dad that letter? How dare he assume I wouldn't love him? Why hadn't he turned to Jesus? Did he turn to Jesus? I drove myself crazy with all these thoughts. Then one year on his birthday I released it all, I forgave him for the hurt he caused me, and I left it all in God's hands. I won't know until I get to heaven if my dad turned to Jesus; but God has assured me I did my part.

Following is a poem my dad wrote to me in college. He mounted it on a wooden heart he made for me. It gives me some comfort that yes, I was loved. My uncle read it again at my dad's funeral, it was a reminder of the dad he wanted to be, before alcohol stole him away!

Brenda Dear...

 You are such a sport and scholar about you I want to shout and holler. 

Even though we are miles apart; Your smiles are treasures in my heart. 

 You are to me a joy and special love, for you are my little snow white dove. 

You've always been a special pearl, and yes you'll always be your daddy's little girl. 

 Just to see you gleam, seems to be my fondest dream. 

You will never know just how much you've made me glow. 

 I love to share your cheeers and wipe from your eyes your tears. 

Whenever I feel blue, my heart remembers you. 

 You will never so far that when I see a star, 

My heart is of good cheer, for I feel you very near. 

 And then to add some clout, in case there's any doubt--there really hadn't oughter,

For you'll always be by daughter...Brenda

I still get sad at times when I think about him. I even get angry, wondering why couldn't I have had a father who was there for me. Its at these times when God whispers in my ear, I'm there for you, I'm your Father. God is such a loving Father, His arms have held me tight in this grieving process. He has always been there for me  and my heavenly Father has written me a letter. It's a love letter, the Bible. It is there I find the most comfort and its there I get the "hugs" I so desperately long for!!

Seek God First on Vacation...

Today's post is being brought to you by my hubby, the guy who makes me smile!

 

Summer time is in full swing.  (Pun intended with baseball season) As we move into summer we all have some different routines. We spend a lot more time outside and most of us try to take vacations.  Some trips are lengthy with many miles, sights, and places. Whether it is a long journey or an extended weekend let me encourage you to seek God first.  How?  Here are three things I suggest.

1)      Read a devotional together.  Get a daily bread or a daily devotional that you can read individually or as a family. Read and discuss it each day of your vacation.  Renew your mind with a fresh read from devotional.  Keep it simple.  www.rbc.org

2)      Go to a different Church. I know the temptation is to ‘take a week off.’  As a family we like to visit a different church.  You can find services on Saturday night or Sunday morning.  Make it an adventure. Try something different that you think you might all appreciate and enjoy.

3)      Read – if you are traveling, camping or relaxing bring along your Bible or that book you have been wanting to read.  Renew your mind by taking the time in the car, hotel room or at the campsite to read. 

So whether it is a couple of days or a couple of weeks, slow down, relax and enjoy your relationship with God and your relationships with others.   Not only will you appreciate your family, your church and your friends, you just might renew your relationship with God.  If you are traveling to a scenic location take time to appreciate the beauty of God’s Creation.  Now that would be a great vacation!

If you try one of these let me know.   I’d be glad to hear what you try and how it works for you.

Brian (Husband of the Ponderer)

You ready to jump...

"I do it myself!" says a toddler trying to put on his shoes for the first time.

"Daddy, catch me!" says a child as he jumps into the pool. He waits until daddy has his arms stretched out and then without hesitation jumps.

Who are we more like, the child who says "I do it myself!" or the child who says "Daddy, catch me?" Are we telling God to leave us alone or are we trusting Him with our lives. God did not design us to do it ourselves, yet too often we try to do it alone. Life is much more exciting when we trust God and take that leap of faith.

God wants us to trust Him, He has amazing plans in store for us! Sometimes we just have to jump. Putting our plans in God's hands is pretty exciting. The verse I have clung to since I became a Christian is Jeremiah 29:11: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 

Lately God has been helping me to look at this verse in a new light. I am about a year away from two very significant events; my youngest child graduating and my oldest getting married. God is telling me this verse applies to their lives too! As our son goes off to college at a yet to be determined (but most likely far away) school, God has plans for him. As our daughter gets married, God has plans for her. God has plans for our middle daughter as well; mostly likely involving a foreign country! 

Am I able to let go? As my kids once again say "I do it myself!"; am I able to believe that they can do it themselves. Can I trust that as they leave my nest they will be jumping into God's arms saying, "Daddy, catch me!" Did I model my faith enough for them? Did they see me jumping into God's arms enough? And as my kids start the next phase of their lives will I be jumping into God's arms myself?

The answers to those questions has to be yes. Yes, because God is the center of my life and I have leaned on Him as these kids have grown up. I have seen my kids jump and land safely in God's will. God says He has plans to prosper and not harm them, so how can I not trust that? Will it always be easy for them, no. Life will throw them just enough trials to keep them on their knees. It is hard to watch one of your kids struggle, but awesome at the same time to watch God work in them through that struggle.

So, what is God telling you to let go of? Is He asking you to jump? I promise He will catch you and that is an exciting thing!

Answered prayers are awesome...

In 1989, Brian and I found out we were pregnant with our first child. We were so excited and throughout the pregnancy prayed for a healthy baby. Then on January 23, 1990 our Ashley was born and the praying started immediately. She had some health complications and was in the NICU for 24 hours. Once they fixed her problems (collapsed lung) she was fine. That was a huge answer to prayer.

Brian and I of course continued to pray for her, the main prayer was that she would come to know Christ at a young age. On September 5th, 1993 that prayer was answered and it was at a young age! Her first prayer as a Christian was for her baby sister to become a Christian too. One year and 6 days later, Ashley led Abby to the Lord. We were surprised by that one and didn't believe it at first. We should know better than to question yet another prayer answered.

We prayed that not just Ashley but her brother and sister would grow in the Lord and make their faith their own. Today all three are walking with the Lord! It is exciting to see Jesus living in them and working through them. Another prayer answered.

We prayed for so many thing over the years, and God has been faithful in answering almost all of those prayers. One of our longest running prayers for Ashley has been for her future spouse. We have prayed for him as long as we've been praying for Ashley. We continue to pray for him, but now we can pray for him by name...Larry.
 

May 30, 2011 our daughter became engaged!!

We are of course thrilled and so thankful to God. Larry is an answer to our prayers. He loves our daughter, we love him and most importantly, He loves Jesus! In just one short year, these two will become man and wife. Our job will not end there... Brian and I will continue praying for them and praise God for the answers along the way!!

Prayer has been the backbone of my relationship with God; I can't imagine life without prayer. Brian and I may not pray together daily (we try); but prayer has been a strong foundation of our marriage and parenting. It is our praying (not parenting) that has resulted in 3 pretty amazing kids. Even if one of our children were not walking with the Lord right now, we would keep on praying and trusting and believing that one day God would answer our prayers for them. As parents we truly feel prayer is the MOST important thing we can do for our children.

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. 

Proverbs 22:6

A valuable resource for praying for your kids:

 Stormie has a whole series of The Power of a Praying...you name it she helps you pray for it! I strongly recommend you look into investing in these books and most importantly investing in prayer!!

A priceless way to pass the torch...

Gas for trip to Texas...$338

Tuition for school... $11,000

One year with Jesus...PRICELESS!! 

That is how I feel about His Hill Bible School in Comfort, Texas. Last week Brian and I made the long drive to Texas to pick up our middle daughter from her year at His Hill; two years ago we made that same trip to pick up our oldest daughter. 

 His Hill is one of 26 Torchbearers Centres in 20 countries on 4 continents around the globe. The main curriculum at these school is the Bible. At His Hill students spend 23 hours a week in classes. They meet Jesus here in a powerful and amazing way. The schools are small and therefore the students, faculty and staff become family. Our daughters have friends from all over the world, from Canada to Argentina and Germany; in fact we sent them to Texas and they came home with a Canadian accent.

The statement of faith for Torchbearers reads like this: "Our mission is to proclaim the transforming presence of Jesus Christ through biblical teaching and practical training, equipping men and women for service in His church worldwide." The phrase repeated most often at this school is "For this I have Jesus."

Discipleship groups (D-groups) were a big part of their experience. They met every Friday and these women were a big part of our daughter's experience.

Abby with her D-group

Ashley with her D-group leader.

 

This the building where the 23 hours of classes happened.

The girls at the front gate.

Below are pictures of the girls on the last night. They are sporting what I call the 

"His Hill Glow". This glow comes from spending a year with Jesus!!

 

 Goodbyes are the hardest part of the year. The first good bye is the family in September, and then the goodbye to all the amazing friends in May. Goodbyes are never fun, but the bonds made at His Hill will stay with these girls for life!

For this I have Jesus

 The year our girls each spent here was truly priceless. We have referred to this as their gap year, the year in between high school and the rest of their lives. It was a tough year for them, but they have also said it was the most life changing year of their lives so far! Their faith was strong when we dropped them off in September, when we picked them up in May it was unshakable! I encourage parents to look into Torchbearers (there are other school similar in nature to these school such as Youth with a Mission) or a Christian college (some of my favorites are listed below) for your graduates. For us, we wanted a place that would help our kids grow in their faith as part of our passing the baton of our faith to our kids!

I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.  

Galatians 2:20 (New American Standard Bible)

Websites to check out:

Torchbearers

His Hill

LeTourneau
Patrick Henry College 
 Cedarville University

Handing off our faith...

I just finished reading through Judges and wow, there really is a lot in this book! The theme God seemed to be giving me this time is one of leaving a legacy, not just leaving it but making it sure the next generation accepts that legacy and carries it on. What good is it to leave a Godly legacy if the kids don't pick it up? I understand that no matter how hard you try some kids won't pick it up, no matter how much teaching and praying, there will always be some rebellion. However, that doesn't mean we shouldn't do all we can for our children. We need to pass the baton of our faith on to our children.

In Judges 2:10 it says this; "After that whole generation had been gathered to their father, another generation grew up, who knew neither the Lord nor what he had done for Israel." This seems to indicate that the older generation was not passing on to the next one just what God had done for them. Who did they expect the next generation to hear it from if not themselves? The book of Judges is full of verses like this, God would raise up a godly judge and then as soon as they were gone the people would turn back to idols. What lessons can we learn from these Israelites? How can we pass on a legacy to our kids?

1) Read the Bible with your children. Begin when they are young. Teach them that the events in the Bible are true, not just random "stories". As your kids get older, model to them how to study the Bible. Start small and build from there. Help them understand the significance of both the Old and New Testament and that the events are indeed all true. Help them picture how big the ark was, tell them what a leper was, explain how painful Jesus' death was to Him (not getting too graphic for little ones).

2) Let your kids see you reading your Bible. If they see how important your time with God and His word are that will speak volumes more than your words can. Children observe and copy parent's actions often. (they copy the bad stuff too!)

3)  Share your faith stories with your children. Don't just make sure they hear about all the great men and women of faith in the Bible. Let them hear your story; how you came to know the Lord and how He is working in your life now. Even if you weren't saved out of  a life of drugs and alcohol, you were saved and God has done amazing things in your life. I know sometimes kids roll their eyes when parent's start sharing events from when they were a kid, but they need to see not only how God worked in the Bible but how He worked in your life, and how He is working now!

4) Pray for your kids. This is something my husband and I started doing before our kids were born. Having our first daughter be in the NICU for 24 hours gave us an opportunity to begin praying for her more diligently. Recently we came across a prayer list we made years ago while attending a Family Life Parenting weekend. We were amazed at how God had answered our prayers for each of our kids. An example is our middle daughter, she went through a phase where she would just lie all the time. Today, this girl can't tell a lie even if she tried! It's amazing to us how our prayers tamed this girl's bad habit so much so that it's completely gone. Remember to keep praying for your kids, not matter how old they are. A parent's job is never really done!

5) Two books I recommend. One book is for you as parents to read. Already Gone talks about how we are losing kids in the church.  This book says that those who faithfully attend Sunday School are more likely to leave the church than those who do not. There are many more statistics that will alarm you, but there's hope and this book addresses what parents and churches can be doing now.

Growing Up Christian is an excellent resource for teenagers to read. It talks about the dangers of not making your faith your own. Too often kids depend on their parents faith and never really make it their own (like the Israelites did in Judges).

For more information on either book just click on its picture.

                        

Our time on the earth is but a dot, so let it be said of us that we left behind a Godly legacy and that we were a blessing to our children!!

Be Strong and Courageous...

Be strong and courageous...God says this three time to Joshua in just three verses in Joshua 1. When God says something once you listen, when He says it three times, you REALLY listen! God is saying this to Joshua just before the Israelites cross the Jordan to set foot for the first time in the Promised Land. God knows what awaits Joshua and that to be an effective leader he needs to be strong and courageous. In order to take the Promised Land many enemies must be destroyed and God is assuring Joshua that He is with them!

 Be strong and courageous...this is what God said to 12 year old Ibaragi Kun as he awaited his crucifixion in 1596. A young Japanese Christian, Ibaragi asked which cross was his; when told his was the small one, he ran up to it and embraced his cross. He faced his death with courage, and gave other believers courage as well.

 Be strong and courageous...God says this to me as well. I may not be a Joshua or an Ibaragi, but God has called me to be strong and courageous. My enemies may not be the same as Joshua, I may not be asked to recant my faith like Ibaragi, but my enemies are real. God wants me to know that He will be with me where ever I go and no matter what my enemies are!

Be strong and courageous...God tells this to me as I face the unknown. God has been working on helping me figure out what I want to be when my kids grow up! I will always be mom, but with just one year left of a bird in the nest, God has been stirring my heart. I get nervous and excited about what He has in store for me. My main ministry for 21 years has been raising my kids, in May of 2012 I will be crossing into unknown territory. I will grieve the empty nest, but God is telling me to be strong and courageous, He has great plans for me. This is important for me to know as my son goes through his  senior year and all those lasts, and I go through numerous Kleenex!

Be strong and courageous...what in your life do you need to be strong and courageous for? Do you need the reminder that God is with you where ever you are? He is...don't forget it!!!

Easter Week...

This has been a strange week for me. I've been extra emotional and some days just plain cranky. The week started off awesome with baptisms at church, those always make me cry, and my heart was full. But then came Tuesday, the day we woke up with SNOW covering the ground. April 19th and it snowed, its golf and track season, not ski season! I love snow, but enough is enough!

Then I got to thinking. This week has been an emotional roller coaster for me, was God using this week and my emotions as an object lesson? The week Jesus died was a week with a far greater emotional roller coaster ride.

I began to imagine what it would have been like to be a spectator on Jesus' last week. To be there waving palm branches as He entered Jerusalem that day. To shout hosanna and to watch my King enter the city! Wow, what  a celebration that must have been.

Fast forward to Thursday. Can you imagine hearing that Jesus had been arrested? That the King you just celebrated is being beaten over and over. Then to see the crowd who welcomed Him so joyously turn on Him and ask for his crucifixion. 

Can you imagine the horror of watching Him carrying His own cross? With the guards taunting Him and the crown of thorns digging deeper into His head?

Can you hear the nails as they pounded them into His body? The horror of seeing Him up there bleeding on the cross? Then to see Him take His final breath? We can only partially imagine the actual cruelty of His death.

Then came those dark days of trying to adjust to what you have just seen. Did it really happen? Why did my King have to die? Where is my hope? What do I do? Then you hear that his tomb is empty, He is gone! Who would do such a thing? Hasn't we suffered enough? Just when you are at the bottom of your emotional roller coaster, you are told, He's not in the tomb because He's alive! Yes! It's true Jesus lives! Oh the joy and excitement, as all the pain and anguish from the past three days washes away.

My Redeemer Lives!!!!